CHRIS BAMIDELE: The side chick, Know your place

CHRIS BAMIDELE: The side chick, Know your place


Before I start, I believe we all know who a side chic is or what it means to be one, but in case you don’t know, ‘side chicism’ dated back to the time of the Bible.

when Mother Sarah didn’t have a child and asked father Abraham to sleep with her maid Hagar, who later bore a child who was named Ishmael, and when the maid started to do “gra-gra” she was promptly reminded of her status as a side chic and shown the door before matter go come spoil.

Well, I guess we now know the origin of side chic at least as recorded in the Bible. Good!

I know some of you ladies are thinking right now why a guy in a relationship or marriage would have a side chic; and the only thing I can say to that is, many ladies simply love to be side chics.

I know there are so many ladies out there who are proud to say, married men are more romantic and responsible than single guys, and they are actually dating the married guys, thereby effectively restricting themselves to side chics’ status.

Some would tell you, there are no longer single guys, so just date whoever you like and shove some other babe out of his life to become the number one. So, whichever way you look at it, there have been side chics, there are side chics, and there will always be side chics.

And if you are among those reading this and saying “Over my dead body, I can’t be a side chic and my boyfriend cannot have a side chic” but your mum is the second or third wife in your family, Biko! Take several seats.

Now, let’s talk about staying in your lane as a side chic; before you start claiming some non-existent rights, and embark on some gra-gra spree.

Truth is, if you’re a side chic who wants to keep up a relationship with a guy who has a main chic; then you have to know the rules of the game.

You can’t expect the relationship to be more than what it is and you are not expected to worry about where the relationship is going, because the minute you start to question your status as a side chic, or ask for something more, all of the fun will go out the window.

So if you want to be a good side chic, you have to stop stressing out and learn to have a good time with your man, or else you’ve gotta get out. You dig?

So, here are few things to do to help you stay in thy place and maintain thy lane.

 Give Us Space…You don’t have to always be the first to text or call, give some breathing room please. In short, don’t call first, if we want to get in touch with you, we’ll send you a text or call you; if you try to call or text anyhow, you could be putting us in an awkward situation because we may be with the main chic; and since we don’t plan to have more than one wife/girlfriend, it’s advisable you stay on your own job function, which is to be something different, and to be fun. You even have the right to do your own thing most times, so go out with your girlfriends, have a good time, but don’t worry about checking in with us every five minutes

 Don’t Ever Have “The Talk”…When you start having the “What are we doing?” “Where is this going?” “What are we now?” kind of talk, you are actually pushing us away. You have to know your lane, stay there and quit all the serious talk that only the main chic has an exclusive right to. Yeah, some side chics do somehow end up as mains, but you don’t upgrade yourself, and you don’t force it, we decide when you should be upgraded; and that is, if there is ever going to be any upgrading in the first place…….To be continued