Please I want to remain anonymous
I have been wanting to share this, but don’t know whom to confide in. I hope I get practical advice.
I got married to the love of my life in 2013 November, before then, he introduced me to his parents and they welcomed me before the wedding.
He lost his job after the wedding, we moved to his friend’s house, he never told me his company gave him money to rent an apartment when it folded up, I got to know through his colleague. He does not discuss anything about his business with me. I always have to squeeze out any information I need from him. I tried to support him in the little way I can.
We travelled to his home town the Christmas of 2013. His parents called a meeting because I did not wake up by 6am to sweep the compound, meanwhile I do every other thing, cooking, washing plates, cleaning the house.I even learnt how to make my father in-laws meals because he does not eat same thing with the rest of the family.
My hubby refused to get a job. The next Christmas ( 2014 ) I had to borrow money from a friend for us to travel. My dad has been asking me to come home, but because of work I couldn’t, that’s why I borrowed to make it possible, I spent two days with them and decided to go see my dad on the 30th.
My dad was not around. He travelled, I had to wait for him to come back. He came back on the 1st January 2015. Yes i waited for my dad to get back against the wish of my husband, because according to his family tradition, everyone must be around on the 1st of January to celebrate the new year.
When I came back on the second of January with my dad, my dad offered to drop me. I met my husband, who had already packed my things that am leaving his house, His father even hit me, saying I should stand up and leave his house.
All these were happening in the presence of my dad, so my dad helped me carry my things and we left.
Later in April, we went back home to reconcile, but I don’t call the parents on the phone like I always used to do, neither do they call me after the incident.
When I travelled home the following Christmas, my hubby said, I should not come to the house, that his parents are not happy with me. I insisted I’ll come and I went. Truly his father came in and asked me to leave, and hubby was in support. To avoid being hit again, I left.
I got tired of the whole situation and told my parents am no longer interested in the marriage, so they returned my bride price December 2016. My hubby filed for divorce January 2017.
We did not have any child, because both of us did not have the means to raise one.
I have always been the one apologising whenever we have any problem.
The thing is, he wants to come back, he started calling me this April, but am tired, I just want a peaceful life. Since 2013 up till now it’s been one problem or the other. I have been squatting with my friend from when his friend sent me out of his house with my hubby’s order.
Now I have a good job, even though I want out, am scared I might not find someone that will love me, and I don’t want that title ”divorcée”.
How would people see me, am so confused.
#TogetherWeCan #SayNoToDomesticViolence #SayNoChildAbuse #TheLotusVoices.