Then i got accepted into a school of health by 2011. i told Vincent family and they held a meeting. The did not like it. girls who go to nursing schools are whores and sleep around. and will kill their husbands to keep their side men. See second Part HERE
Then i told a senior friend. she asked me if i was still a virgin and i told her yes. She did not believe. ‘You mean you and the guy dated and he did not touch you’. That is it, that is why he left you. she said.’
I told her I vowed to keep it. and I will, but unknown to me, she was making bad plans for me. Around feb 2011 she had introduced me to her cousin who came back from university. He told her i was brilliant but that i looked too bright eyed to be saintly and more over everyone knows no girl in Aba is still a virgin. so when she found out i was she told him immediately.
11th March 2011 she asked me to escort her to her brother’s house so we can get money for kerosene to cook as we were both broke. On getting there, he said he was sick and haven’t eaten. In fact he just managed to buy this Pepsi and Fanta for us. The food stuff he wanted to cook is still in the kitchen, and he is too weak.
My senior friend stroke a bargain, let her go buy kerosene and i will cook for the guy when she is back. we will go. That’s how i was dumped in the middle of no where and had no money one me even if i tried to find my way in an empty compound and my innocent mind not knowing the less.
i cooked and we ate. he drank the Pepsi and offered me the Fanta. my kid mind did not ask why it was open and i just drank.
Few minutes later i told him i was sleepy. he showed me the bed and told me to wait out my girlfriend.
i was not even asleep when my nightmare began. he left the ground for the bed.
I ignored it plus i was too weak to object. Then he began to touch me. telling me i was beautiful. since he saw me, and the week he had tried to steal a kiss at the restaurant and i had cried all the way back to the hostel he was amaze at such innocence but then he can’ t believe me cause i mentioned dating a guy for a few year. so he needed proof.
I tried to plead with him and fight the drowsiness, but i was too weak a child to hold him out, I had an entire hand shoved into my mouth when i tried to scream. how he did it i can not say, but his elbows where holding my hand at the same time, his knees had my legs apart and pressed down and in that one moment i lost what i fought through abuses to keep.
Who will i tell. how will i explain to my mum. Does it mean i was born for abuse? I just lay there crying and the idiot came telling me sorry. Its because you were afraid. you body says yes and you want it. but you are afraid. Immediately i entered didn’t you stop fighting.
Are you bleeding too much. Remember i once told you adult girls go through a natural phase of life. You are now a complete woman. That is how life is and more over after two months of no activity you will go back to being a virgin and no one will know. I have seen you told the truth.
He then called the sister that he was bringing me back, is she in school. and she saidshe was in school. I try not to believe she knew what was up, but then i can’t say.
Weeks later she asked me how far. are you co operating with my brother,
‘No do like small child o. so he can marry you. give him what he wants na. i know you are no longer a virgin and moreover if you don’t do it and keep crying you will become frigid and not enjoy it and your husband will be cheating on you.’
i could not tell her that, i felt like the whole world knew. The force with which he entered hurt me and the dislocation from an accident in my primary three was shifted again.
I had a terrible infection and cant tell my mum. cause if i mention anything about down there first thing she will do is look at my vagina. How can I tell her? I remember about my dad pursuing me with a cutlass the day i was found outside talking to the new yard neighbour’s son. cause we had relocated to a compound with just two flats ours and the pastor’s. and he had cut me bluntly with it.
So i held my peace. but i googled frigid with her phone. read about it. and it pointed to what she said. if this guy can do this to me. he may leave me for another girl if i don’t give in, Then i will become another innocent man’s heart ache. better with him than another.
Then again mum said who ever you have joined with outside marriage is my husband on earth and heaven. so i guess i have been married off illegally.
I was feeling guilty all the time. i had sex with him twice after the abuse. and found out i did not like it. and more over it felt like he was always hitting on my womb or something making my inside sore.
So one evening i was thinking of how to break up and how to deal with my situation i decided to go home straight. and not school, we entered a bus together and a preacher was on air, a woman, she talked about such issues like mine and how the person isn’t condemned.
I can go back to christ and be his daughter again. I got my strength from there and when we got to my home i told him i will call him. He went back to school and never called me. Then i called him but he wont pick.
His sister told me to tell him i was pregnant and see his reactions, I did and the kind of abuse i received is better off not said. He said in fact he didn’t even break me. because he expected the blood to full a jug, I just bleed on the sheets and didn’t faint unlike his friends girl. that he knew it.
I have been looking for a way to become lose and run around with men, so the moment he left the state he knew i was condemn property. flying around, I should know am like shit, I only will attract the flies that will come and go. like a monkey jumping from tree to tree but never living in one.
I was so depressed and I failed school that semester. i felt like all laughter was about me and every eyes was watching me.
To be continued…..