This is how it begun….
So I got home from school (I was 16 at the time) and logged onto facebook immediately (as was the life of a typical teen in my days). The first thing I did was check my notifications and saw that I had been tagged in a couple of posts, pictures and a few event invites plus a couple of friend requests, which of course is what I was most interested in (we all loves seeing that friend icon light up!)
So this “friend” request was from a Sarah. M. and why was this name so significant you may be wondering ?… well firstly let me give a little bit of context. I had been in a long term relationship with my (then) boyfriend. I’ll call him Antony for the sake of this retell…So we had been in a relationship for coming up to two years now, as you can imagine, conversations about past experiences and previous relationship had long been had, and so I was aware that his most recent ex was called Sarah.M…
I had also seen pictures of her and so from going through her profile, I was certain of her identity. You could imagine my surprise when I saw her image pop up in my notifications. So according to Antony, they had been in a relationship for 2 years, and had broken up for some reason or another.
I can’t remember the exact reason that he gave, (this story happened at 16, I am now 25) but the reason doesn’t matter as you will soon understand why….so back to this new “friend” request. I didn’t accept it straight away. I was thinking what the hell did this girl want? So fast forward to the evening now, I called him and we chatted for a while..asked him how his day had been going, how was college etc..then I hit him with it. Game on…
“So…why’s your ex adding me on facebook?”
huh.. * raises eyebrow * Tell me ladies isn’t there anything worse than that dumbfounded face/tone of voice, accompanied with that Scooby Doo” huh, that follows from a simple direct question.
“huh” I repeated “Yeah your ex..Sarah.. I got a fb friend request from her”
“Are you sure it was her’
“Yes Antony, it said Sarah.M has sent you a request and it was her, I checked her profile and its deffo her, so are you going to answer the question? I thought you didn’t talk, so how does she know about me?”
“When did she add you”
Rolls eyes* “today.”
“Okay. Hold on just one second.. * automated voice * “you have been placed on hold, please wait….”
At this point I was thinking okay then, what is going on?. After a few minutes he came back on the line and apologized, saying that he was speaking to a family member…
“So are you going to answer the question?”
“Basically just delete her. She has been adding a few of my female friends on facebook, I dunno why”
“well maybe I should ask her, see what she wants then”
“Listen, if you don’t delete her, and make sure you do not add her again, or else I’m just going to break up with you!”
Can you imagine ! he was giving ME ultimatums as if I had done something wrong here ! And what is worse is, I can’t remember the exact details of the conversation that followed, but I can tell you that I basically did what he said and deleted her and we never spoke about it again. I know you are probably thinking am the biggest ode, and trust me I felt like one too, for not probing properly and demanding answers, but what can I say, I was young and naïve, and as he was my first proper boyfriend (not to mention I lost my virginity to him) I did not want to do anything to jeopordise the relationship….To Be Continued…..
THE LOTUS VOICES…WE KEEP IT REAL..#StandUpAgainstViolenceOnWomen..#TogetherWeCan…